Star Trek: Strange New Worlds VII by Dean Wesley Smith & Paula M. Block & John J. Ordover & Elisa J. Kassin

Author:Dean Wesley Smith & Paula M. Block & John J. Ordover & Elisa J. Kassin
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Gallery Books
Published: 2004-06-29T00:00:00+00:00

Infinite Bureaucracy

Anne E. Clements

Bill of lading in datachip form, attached to a container of 20,735 self-sealing stembolts found floating in the Oort cloud of the Aeolian system:

Consignee Designation: Quark of Ferenginar

Consignee UAC *: UFP_.21601.B23.DS9.P26.0000001

Consignor Designation: Flem of Ferenginar

Consignor UAC: TZ_.3654.TZ42.KL92.00086540

Order Date: 48601.4

Order Received Date: 48601.4

Order Processed Date: 48601.4

Order Transcription

Image record of a Ferengi, middle-aged, snappy dresser, with wide, pleasant rather than handsome features (by Ferengi standards), against a backdrop of an empty refreshment/recreation establishment decorated in oranges and browns. He speaks in Ferengi.

“Flem! Quark here, your uncle Birk’s second cousin’s mentor’s nephew’s third partner’s older son. I’m in the market for a shipment of self-sealing stembolts, and Goln of Fromaginar II mentioned that a Terellian trader heard that a Tzenkethi manufacturer went bankrupt and sold his entire stock at a discount to one of our people. I did a little digging, and your name came up. I was wondering if you might be interested in unloading, say, a glerint or so.”

The image splits, the right-hand half showing an older, more reptilian-looking Ferengi in a tight gray garment that looks something like mummy wrappings. He tugs thoughtfully at one ear.

“A glerint, you say? I suppose I could spare a glerint. If the price is right, of course. Where exactly did you say you were, again?”

“Deep Space Nine. It’s a Federation space station, near Bajor.”

“Never heard of it.”

“It’s not far from Cardassia. Used to be occupied by the Cardassians, actually, but you know how these things go.”

“Oh, yes, now I remember. That’s quite a ways off. Your transport costs are going to cut pretty deeply into your profit—I assume you actually do have a buyer? You’d have to be pretty desperate to engage in a venture like this on spec.”

“Oh, I have a buyer. I also have a transport connection that can pick up the cargo at Starbase 201…”

(Haggling ensues, in which Quark, apparently with great reluctance, brings up the rumor he heard about the Tzenkethi factory owner’s not having completely filled out the transfer-of-ownership forms, and various creditors working their way through the Tzenkethi legal system to claim the remaining assets. Eventually, a price is agreed upon.)

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